So I thought about your reasoning and realised what was wrong with it.

You say that being yourself from day 1 is because you want to show the girl that's how you are. And she should be able to accept it.

The thing is, all girls expect the woo-ing period to be more sugar-coated than the actual relationship because that's just how people work, when trying to get someone to like them.

If you behave this way from day 1, the girl would wonder, "if you're behaving like this now, what's to say you won't be worse in the future?"

This, is mere logic. No?

Perhaps I am thinking too much into it. But it's human nature to consider the outcome of any situations.

If you say that you want me to like you, naturally I will start to consider whether we are good together. Whether I can accept your character, your behaviour, and how you treat me.

Like holding a scoresheet in hand and calculating the points so far; even if it may sound superficial, that is how everyone works. Everyone has an imaginary scoresheet which they use on different occasions to decide if someone is worth it.

I am sure that you have one for me too, only, you are choosing not to think about it now. Or maybe that's just what you want me to think for now.

Perhaps I am asking too much in hoping that because you want things to work out, you will rectify the problems of the past. Things you know I hated. Actions you made that you knew once hurt me.

I'm not too sure if I see them yet, but I will not count the score for a few more rounds and I hope that things will be different by then.

But to be honest. Is that too much to ask?

-

Even now, I'm wondering if it was a mistake to begin with.

-